Monday, sodding.. morning.

Uh, I can't find my PE top, which is a silly thing to get stressed over, but it adds to more and more worries of a monday fucking morning. Why couldn't it be where I wanted it to be? Why wasn't it washed by the mother? Where the fuck is it in fact.
Wow.
Is this what my blog has become?
A moan about my PE top.
I'll probably lose followers or something.
Dear fuck.
Is this what my life has become?
No.
Just.. woah.

Anyway.
Have a good week!
xo

And Don't You Let Me Go, Tonight.

As I type, the beautiful Lykke Li sings inside my computer screen, her stunning voice echoing inside my front room.
I can hear the buzzing of a car outside and my brother shouting at the XBOX.
Doesn't it make you think? Your ears, so delicate, so relied upon, let you listen to the most beautiful of things..

Tonight I'm off to hers.
I will let her know that I'm not a bitch and I can be nice sometimes.
I guarantee I will go into one of those moods though.
I can't help it. I get stuck. Stuck? Yes, I physically come to a stop, whereas my mind races and races.
In my mind it is because I'm in love. In her mind it's because I'm just a twat?

And tomorrow? I might be going out with some people for a beloved person's birthday.
My weekend should be lush!

Anyway, I hope you all have fabulous weekends. xo

Jasmine Drury, This Is For You.

Well.
What would we do without her?
She can talk black, stare into space and do the 'sad face'.
To be honest, if I didn't have her in my life - I don't know where I'd be ;)
She comes into school for Jess, Hayley and I when she's feeling ill and gives me giggles when we eat our lunch, by telling me her crisps smell like BLUE WAFFLE.
We sit in textiles on Fridays and bitch, curse and laugh.
What would we do without her?
Simple, we wouldn't be able to live ;)
And asif I'm going to wish you luck on getting to sleep tonight! ;)
BUT THEN YOU WON'T COME IN ;[ OH MY GOD, SLEEEEEP WOMAN!
HOPE THAT'S OKAY, JASMINGE.
<3

HELLO 70TH POST, I'm Ashleigh.

Today was average. An average day, with average faces, average lessons and average moods. It rained once again, then got sunny, then rained. Patterns like that depress me. Also, at lunch time 'we' couldn't go in the 'lunch time room' because it's basically a complete and utter mess, so we had to go outside with some girls and freeze my tits off. Nice ay?

I really should do my German, whilst I'm at the computer - but that means going upstairs to get all my work and having to read German; which of course I don't understand. Good god, why did I have to choose it for a GCSE?!

Anyway, this is my 70th post. How exciting?
And by doing this, I thought I'd give it a nice 70's feeling..


How I would've loved to live through a different era.

GOODBYE. xo

Tea & Toast Makes Everything Better.

I'm feeling so much lighter tonight after a long sleep (4-7) after school, then clearing my head and getting on with science coursework.
I'm also just generally in a good mood, which is nice because I can properly talk to Devon without crying at her or something via Facebook!
I'm also now finishing my cup of tea and watching De Ja Vu, which is one of my all time favourite films! I just love Denzel Washington.
I'm struggling with a headache though and thinking I should definitely begin wearing my glasses properly or I will suffer.
Anyway, I have found my love once more for Lykke Li and will be shortly listening to her as soon as I get off Facebook, stop blogging and De Ja Vu finishes.
Goodnight, sleep tight - xo

Do Not Read.

It's one of those nights.
I'm completely alone when I feel like this. Completely unhappy, unsatisfied, pathetic and worst of all - useless.
I even tried telling her. Why did I do that? Putting my fucked up little unimportant 'problems' on other people - who do I think I am? It's disgraceful, uncaring, cruel and unfair.
I need to sort out my head, I'm just a wreck. One day I'm fine, next I'm a mess. And for what reason? Well, you tell me..

Saturday.

Home alone, iPod on, TV muted, drinking blackcurrant, eating a cupasoup, feeling lonely, wrapped in a blanket, waiting for something good to come on the TV, not bothered by the volume of my music, not arsed about what my hair looks like, too hot, too cold, moods not brilliant, ready to cry, welling up.

Perfect Saturday. I promise - xo

Beach, Skins, Bed.

Beach party was pretty awful! After some drinking, talking and laughing, I ended up walking to dee's.

I also had to wait to watch skins till just now because mother was watching some shit about the 'REAL ER' which made me want to die!
But yeah, skins <3 made me friggin' well upset! Ahaha, just wish the girls would kiss and make up too ;D

I'm way tired now too, drinking + cold + walking = death.
And tomorrow, I have to be up early to go see my bab and the other wreckheads ;)

And Tayler is such a frickin' sweetheart;
1:16am Tayler
like i know, we live far far far apart. but you're my biggest girl crush(:

Anyway, I'm off to bed. I love you all <3

Your Love Is My Drug,

So today I have done absolutely nothing, and to be honest - I don't even feel that guilty. It's annoyed me that I can't do this coursework as I'm too thick, but I'm not going to stress myself out too much to the point where I am pulling my hair out. I'll just have to work proper hard and get as much help as I can when I go back to school, because I want to do well. I have to do well.

Anyway, Ke$ha - Your Love Is My Drug, is actually an alright song. I liked her before Tik Tok got big, bee tee double-you.

My friends think I've gone crazy, my judgements getting kinda hazy;
My esteem is gonna be affected, if I keep it up like a lovesick crackhead.

I Want To Look Like Gaga,

She's so hot :')!
I will never look like Gaga - But I can try and look f i e r c e.

Pain, Moods, Work, Entertainment.

I've got up today with the worst pain in my back you could ever imagine to have. It's like I've been repeatedly thrown into a brick wall or something. It's not nice, as I can't turn around without wanting to die. I love being such a drama queen - but it does hurt.

I'm also in the strangest of moods. Hungry and bored. It's not a good mixture of emotions in my head either, it's making me feel quite sea-sick. I don't know what's up. There's nothing up. I've had an alright weekend, but today I'm just.. not in the mood? I guess I'm alright though?

Earlier I tried to get on with some work, but I'm just not in the mood for it. I have to do a history essay about the relations between the USA and USSR etc and I have to do the first draft of my coursework for science, which is making me want to die because it's the most boring topic they could've thought to have picked. And to top it off - I have to finish, at some point, some art work. There's a textiles day on Wednesday, but I'm not in the mood to go in - plus Jas won't be there, so I'll be alone, in a room, with a bunch of skanky chavs and a dizzy blonde teacher who doesn't know her arse from her elbow.

I want to get out of the house to be honest, but there's not a lot you can do when you live a beastly walk away from friends. Facebook is boring me to tears too, so really the only options I have for any entertainment today are; get on with history, do science, or simply sleep, moan or cry. There is utterly nothing to do. How I wish I was motivated enough to live.

Hope the week brings you joy, xo

Sunday, Valentines, Sunday.

I'm not a complete "It's just another day.." type of person, I mean - people can believe in what they want to believe, even my parents exchanged cards and kisses, so it's like.. hey, think how you want I guess.
But when people only show that they love some one, or make the effort once a year - that's just not right in my books.
Love is love. Yes we know. And love should be expressed in every single moment of the time you are with that person, or not. I'm not saying you should be completely obsessed with that person, but enough to make sure that they know that what you have between you, is in fact love.
I'm new to love, so I wont stress my opinions too much - But when I'm with Devon, the sensations that fill me inside are the most extraordinary feelings anyone could ever feel. And I'm myself around her, she makes me feel important, she makes me feel as if I couldn't do anything wrong and doesn't even make me feel awkward when I have to sort out my period! Ahah, how lovely - but that's how we are. She keeps me smiling, and without her.. well, I don't even want to try and imagine it.
So, happy love day you sods - I hope you all had a beautiful day with the loved ones.
I know that I will definitely be falling asleep with a smile upon my face tonight.
Xx

MOAN, and not the good kind.

FOR FUCK FUCKING SAKE, WITH MORE FUCK ON FUCKING TOP.
Right, now that that is out of my system..
I can't believe that I've just come on my period! Yes! My period, and Yes, I am admitting this to the blogging world. Valentines tomorrow with the girlfriend was supposed to be lovely, you know? Now I won't be able to relax, concentrate or even bother.

Also, I'm babysitting because my parents have decided to go out on the lash. Brilliant, I know. It's not exactly how I pictured this weekend, but who gives a shit about how I feel in this god-for-saken-house.

And some more moaning; I've just burnt the mother-fucking roof of my mouth on melted chocolate! The chocolate that was supposed to cheer me up a bit! But oh no, it has to go and make me like blister! Uh, disgusting. Utterly, completely disgusting.

But yeah, have a good valentines you jammy sods - xo

Music Mix & Moans.

You can lie between her legs and go looking for,
Tell her you're searching for her soul ♥


I have a pretty good playlist going on at the moment;

Cross Your Fingers - Laura Marling
The Cult Of Romance - Fenech-Soler
Coconut Skins - Damien Rice
Foreground - Grizzly Bear
The Cave - Mumford & Sons
Keep Me Warm - Ida Maria
Every Third Sunday - 6 Day Riot
New Theory - Washed Out
Opposite Of Adults - Chiddy Bang
She Wont Let Me Fuck - Afroman

I'm so tired, and I swear all I ever say is that I am in fact tired! It's ridiculous - I've done nothing today yet I am still on the brink of slipping into a coma. Marvellous.
I'm not really in a good mood either to be honest, thus listening to a lot of music and ignoring most of the people on my facebook chat list, aha! Plus she's just gone for a hair cut and I miss her already, bless me.
I've also missed quite a bit of goss from school! Aha, always happens when I'm not there - but oh well, I hated that day on the timetable - especially German last!

Anyway, I've got the flow to make a bitch do a cartwheel xo

The Day Off.

Home because mother wants me to sign for the laptop she's ordered, and as I'm home I've managed to get Sam and Devon to come round for the day.
Ah, I've just got to make sure I don't get grounded aha!
Have a good day you beautiful people xo

Today, yo.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tbk16dKSGGA
I'm in love with this song.

Today, wasn't really that bad; but mathematics was a killer!
The exam wasn't exactly brilliant though. Some of the questions were really stupidly worded and just plain boring to try and answer. It was freezing in the hall too! And the irony was - we were writing about something to do with Antarctica, and it was snowing outside! Wow, I know.

Maths bored the effing life out of me to be honest! I hate learning about finances and that. I'm not good with numbers - in fact, I'm beyond useless and will end up in a dingy flat by myself because I just can't work things out that are important! Or I'll just live with my parents forever.. Actually, from the noise upstairs, I'm thinking maybe not!

I love my girlfriend. Even though she wont come to my house tomorrow, to give me cuddles and miss school with me. Hmm! I get the day off because mother wants me to sign for her delivery, brilliant I know! But you'll have to keep quiet about it! Even though karma will prolly bite me and I'll end up with swine flu or something.

Anyway, I shall go back to being cold, listening to amazing music and chatting to lovelies on facebook chat xo

Exam, LDD's and Luck.

Mock exam for English today, in the hall - with everybody.
I really am not prepared mentally for this. I'm just bumbling about, not knowing what to do with myself. All of a sudden it's dawning on me that our real exams are pretty soon - times going fast and the majority are still all over the place with deciding upon which college to go to. Why does it all have to end? I'm hoping I'll do well, even if it is a mock. I want to carry on with English language for an A level, so I need to do well and have all the practice I possibly can.

It's an LD day today (learning development) and they are definitely the most pointless things on this planet - no one learns anything and we just do.. nothing?
Of course today us year 11's have the English exam, but then the rest of the day we get to do maths! Oh god yeah.. note the sarcasm.

I better eat my toast, drink my tea and go get ready for school.
Wish me luck xo

FACEBOOK, YOU RASCAL!

Why oh WHY do the developers keep changing the layout?!
It's just horrible! I'm sure I'll get used to it soon enough, because we all know that they wont change it back - but it really is the most vile layout they could have chosen. It just looks as if no one has really taken into account that it looks.. shit.
Anyway, I should get off the computer as I want to watch From Hell!
Night xo

Sunday.

Forever laying in when I shouldn't and always getting up early when there's no need. I'm not the only one who is exactly like this, I'm sure.I didn't have to be awake right now as it's only 10:41am, but I am - and it's fine actually. Being awake in the morning on a weekend, is alright?
Anyway, I'm seeing her today, and I'm really excited. You have no idea. I love seeing her, and I haven't seen her since.. Friday?! Ridiculous, I know. Spent most of the evening on the phone to her yesterday though, which was nice. I can't wait to just see her, just so I know she's there. We don't even have to speak, I just like feeling that she's around. Of course then I get into her bed and it's even better aha! It's 3 weeks into it now, it being our 'relationship' and yeah I might sound like one of those bratty girls who count how many days, hours, seconds.. but to be honest - this means something. I appreciate, and value all the things that being with Devon give to me. The things being happiness, the feel of want and need and the obvious; love. So the 3 weeks, yes they might seem like nothing to you - but when you've had the most amazing sensations for some one in the pit of your stomach for over 6 months, and not being able to do anything about it - you ask yourself, is counting 3 weeks (and 1 day) going to do you any harm? And it's not asif I go on about it day in and day out either. I'm just glad that I have some one who loves me and who I know I love back.
Anyway, it's sunday and I'm going to start getting myself together :)
Goodbye, because I need to put some toast in and boil the kettle, y0'! xo

Skins, My Bird and Headaches the Size of GOD.

Skins tonight - meaning I might cry as it's the girls one. (The girls being - Naomi and Emily) I'm excited, scared and not actually prepared if one of them dies! Sad, I know. Lily Loveless is such a good actress though - and bloody good looking! I'll miss her like a bitch if she's the one that dies.

I have such a wonderful girlfriend, you have no idea. Even if we sit and rip the piss out of everything that one another does - we still are in utter love and I adore her completely. Tomorrow, in art and at lunch, should be good cosy, cuddly, lovely times. I'm in love with Devon(L)

Anyway, I'm watching Material Girl! I love this programme, aha!
Gosh, I have such a bad headache - it's making my eyes like twitch..
"Hay crazy lady in the corner! Put some clothes on"
GOODBYE XO