So, OHAI!
I hope you're all doing well :)
I haven't posted in ages as Tumblr seems to be the hot spot and blog spot, just isn't.
Went to Char's BBQ last night, was so good with such a great group of people.
Words to descrbe the night:
Afroman, weed, drunk, BBQ, smiles, gee-tar, girlfriend, Vernon, sheesha, menthol's, grass stains, hearty chats, kisses, cuddles, Dave, Adrian, ketchup, fisherman's chair, mum chat, laughter, mattress, beanbag, 'apprehensive' shorts, dragon, vauxhall, home time.
It was bloody good!
And today, with the girlfriend, I shall be at another BBQ ;)
SEE Y'ALL LATER. x
Saturday, 24 April 2010
Thursday, 8 April 2010
Smoking a lot of cigarettes lately.
I've been thinking, I haven't blogged in forever because basically - things are good!
I have nothing to rant about, or even just bitch on the sly to the blogging world about.
I mean, there's no problem with this - but the minority of us know, reading about other people's tragedy is more fun than reading about how happy they are, because of course the best things come from the blogger's that bitch and moan (my opinion entirely, I think)
Anyway, I swear all I've done is sleep, shower and eat at the girlfriend's house this whole week - her mother must be sick of me. It's so strange coming back home and getting into my own bed though.
I keep expecting to be snuggled into from behind, or feel an affectionate hand on my hips, sides, thigh etc. I even expect that when I turn over, I'll see her laying there, just thinking and breathing beautifully. I even spent Easter in her bed because I slept there on the Saturday and then went back that night.
It's now Friday (still in the mind-set for Thursday though, obviously) and I slept at Dee's on the Wednesday.
Thursday was so lush, and that's not even a joke. Dee, Josh, Sam and I went to the beach for the day, just chilling out in the sun, on the stones, smoking (filthy, I know) and laughing as you do.
It was so lovely, to just not care. I didn't give a thought to anything bar where I would place my head and my hands when I was laying down with Dee and Josh.
It was one of those days where you just didn't want it to end, and you don't want to go home.
I felt utterly out of it all day though, and by the time my Mother made me walk to the train station to be picked up - I was in one of the worst moods I've been in for a while.
Dee walked me there and waited with me for a bit. I didn't want to go home. But I couldn't be in such an awful mood around her, though she says she doesn't mind - I just feel as if It's unfair, you know?
Anyway, getting home and putting washing away, then unpacking my bag and finally getting into my PJ's, I felt relaxed - like I could breathe almost.
Mother cooked a curry, but I sat at the table with my head swaying. Although, I did join in with the banter around the dinner table.
As soon as I start to get comfortable, as I lay on my bed in the dark with my iPod on, I start to have mad crazy thoughts because I miss Dee so much. I love her because she keeps me at my sanest.
OH MY GOD.
I never oh my god, but seriously!
Blogging world - hello :')
My mum told my dad that I'm gay whilst I was out with Dee and Sam. She then rang me to 'warn' me that he wasn't happy and that I should probably avoid him as he basically hates me because I put him through so much shit such as being a vegetarian (which he was for 2 years of his life!) and being a psycho, and not talking to anyone in my house (haha) and now I'm a LESBIAN.
"I'm not a lesbian, I just happen to have a girlfriend"
"You're so confusing"
"You love it"
On-going conversation, it's fine.
Today though, he hasn't exactly looked me properly in the eye - but he's had a few jokes with me, so all is well. It's just my mum trying to stir shit up, I think.
Anyway, aha! Not that exciting, but my dad knows! So basically, it's out. Nothing on my conscience, apart from the fact that dad is 'hurt' that I didn't approach him and mum about it 'before telling the whole of facebook' Mums words entirely.
Jesus effing Christ. I'm tired! So I should probably log off everything and go to sleep!
Busy day tomorrow, as I have to finish (somehow) painting my dress, do revision and do some more art prep, which I utterly can't be bothered with - but it has to be done.
MOTIVATION, I think so!
Have beautiful weekends xo
I have nothing to rant about, or even just bitch on the sly to the blogging world about.
I mean, there's no problem with this - but the minority of us know, reading about other people's tragedy is more fun than reading about how happy they are, because of course the best things come from the blogger's that bitch and moan (my opinion entirely, I think)
Anyway, I swear all I've done is sleep, shower and eat at the girlfriend's house this whole week - her mother must be sick of me. It's so strange coming back home and getting into my own bed though.
I keep expecting to be snuggled into from behind, or feel an affectionate hand on my hips, sides, thigh etc. I even expect that when I turn over, I'll see her laying there, just thinking and breathing beautifully. I even spent Easter in her bed because I slept there on the Saturday and then went back that night.
It's now Friday (still in the mind-set for Thursday though, obviously) and I slept at Dee's on the Wednesday.
Thursday was so lush, and that's not even a joke. Dee, Josh, Sam and I went to the beach for the day, just chilling out in the sun, on the stones, smoking (filthy, I know) and laughing as you do.
It was so lovely, to just not care. I didn't give a thought to anything bar where I would place my head and my hands when I was laying down with Dee and Josh.
It was one of those days where you just didn't want it to end, and you don't want to go home.
I felt utterly out of it all day though, and by the time my Mother made me walk to the train station to be picked up - I was in one of the worst moods I've been in for a while.
Dee walked me there and waited with me for a bit. I didn't want to go home. But I couldn't be in such an awful mood around her, though she says she doesn't mind - I just feel as if It's unfair, you know?
Anyway, getting home and putting washing away, then unpacking my bag and finally getting into my PJ's, I felt relaxed - like I could breathe almost.
Mother cooked a curry, but I sat at the table with my head swaying. Although, I did join in with the banter around the dinner table.
As soon as I start to get comfortable, as I lay on my bed in the dark with my iPod on, I start to have mad crazy thoughts because I miss Dee so much. I love her because she keeps me at my sanest.
OH MY GOD.
I never oh my god, but seriously!
Blogging world - hello :')
My mum told my dad that I'm gay whilst I was out with Dee and Sam. She then rang me to 'warn' me that he wasn't happy and that I should probably avoid him as he basically hates me because I put him through so much shit such as being a vegetarian (which he was for 2 years of his life!) and being a psycho, and not talking to anyone in my house (haha) and now I'm a LESBIAN.
"I'm not a lesbian, I just happen to have a girlfriend"
"You're so confusing"
"You love it"
On-going conversation, it's fine.
Today though, he hasn't exactly looked me properly in the eye - but he's had a few jokes with me, so all is well. It's just my mum trying to stir shit up, I think.
Anyway, aha! Not that exciting, but my dad knows! So basically, it's out. Nothing on my conscience, apart from the fact that dad is 'hurt' that I didn't approach him and mum about it 'before telling the whole of facebook' Mums words entirely.
Jesus effing Christ. I'm tired! So I should probably log off everything and go to sleep!
Busy day tomorrow, as I have to finish (somehow) painting my dress, do revision and do some more art prep, which I utterly can't be bothered with - but it has to be done.
MOTIVATION, I think so!
Have beautiful weekends xo
Sunday, 4 April 2010
Sunny Girlfriend Chocolate Love.
I can't believe it is sunny today and all I am doing is sitting at the computer, half attempting to eat some chocolate and listening to the faint sound of the football in the background.
Luckily though, I woke up next to my girly this morning after spending the night with her and Joshie and Sam and Lauran.
It wasn't all so lovely last night though, oh no! Dee was sick because of the 1/4 bottle of rum she downed to herself. I can't deal with sick - it makes me.. well, feel sick. Thankfully though, Joshua could cope and he was the saviour.
I wish I could've been the saviour, but all I could do was laugh and try not to gag.
I felt like a failure to her - like I proved that I can't help. I felt utterly useless, but I just couldn't do anything to make it better.
I cried too, not because she was being sick (though it got to me), but because the alcohol made my insecurities come out to play and Joshua just knows what to say. He's a good lad.
As is Sam, whom I talked to about stuff to when it was just him and I in Josh's bedroom.
When we got back to hers at 11 o clock at night after Josh and Sam walked us home - She stumbled about, trying not to wake her parents up, and brushed her teeth like a mad woman (Maybe too much information, but it needs to be said for the rest of this to sound less-disgusting) and used mouth wash, as did I.
Laying in her arms after an hour of "Give me an hour, and I'll be fine" we kissed and snuggled into each other. Feeling her against me is the feeling I will never forget. I love the way we touch, it fills me with such sensations that I can't speak nor think. And the loving.. just wow.
I love waking up and not saying anything, then being surprised when her arm falls across my tummy and makes its way to my hand, with our backs still facing each other.
Right now I can see a tiny bit of sun in my back garden, where my cat is sitting in. It has been quite a beautiful day today, yet the only fresh air I got today was getting in and out of the car.
Oh well, I want to see D again - so I might persuade mother to take me over.
Hope you all have a wonderful week ahead and have a lovely Easter Day xo
Luckily though, I woke up next to my girly this morning after spending the night with her and Joshie and Sam and Lauran.
It wasn't all so lovely last night though, oh no! Dee was sick because of the 1/4 bottle of rum she downed to herself. I can't deal with sick - it makes me.. well, feel sick. Thankfully though, Joshua could cope and he was the saviour.
I wish I could've been the saviour, but all I could do was laugh and try not to gag.
I felt like a failure to her - like I proved that I can't help. I felt utterly useless, but I just couldn't do anything to make it better.
I cried too, not because she was being sick (though it got to me), but because the alcohol made my insecurities come out to play and Joshua just knows what to say. He's a good lad.
As is Sam, whom I talked to about stuff to when it was just him and I in Josh's bedroom.
When we got back to hers at 11 o clock at night after Josh and Sam walked us home - She stumbled about, trying not to wake her parents up, and brushed her teeth like a mad woman (Maybe too much information, but it needs to be said for the rest of this to sound less-disgusting) and used mouth wash, as did I.
Laying in her arms after an hour of "Give me an hour, and I'll be fine" we kissed and snuggled into each other. Feeling her against me is the feeling I will never forget. I love the way we touch, it fills me with such sensations that I can't speak nor think. And the loving.. just wow.
I love waking up and not saying anything, then being surprised when her arm falls across my tummy and makes its way to my hand, with our backs still facing each other.
Right now I can see a tiny bit of sun in my back garden, where my cat is sitting in. It has been quite a beautiful day today, yet the only fresh air I got today was getting in and out of the car.
Oh well, I want to see D again - so I might persuade mother to take me over.
Hope you all have a wonderful week ahead and have a lovely Easter Day xo
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